I just wrote seven thousand words on Eddie Vedder's new haircut.
Ooo. Good for you. I hear that he's a really nice guy. Did you meet him for some micro beers during the interview?
Naw, I made the whole story up. Figured that not even one person on Earth is going to read the article anyway.
Yeah, I pulled that same stunt last month with a story on Africa and the AIDS epidemic.
Is that even a story anymore?
Well, I was actually doing a follow-up on a Lamar Odom cannibal orgy that had reportedly happened in the Ivory Coast region and I sort of stumbled upon a mass grave of dead children and then I just took a few pictures and tweaked a few details and then ten thousand words came out of my lap top and I got paid a lot of money.
That's quite an interesting writing process you have there.
Yeah, I dropped out of a really good school.
Do you always talk in run-on sentences?
Sometimes. I'm not sure. I get hit in the head a lot. Hey, have you seen the cute new intern?
Hell, yeah! She's hot!
Right!?
Just what we needed to break up the sausage fest around here. Is she a writer, too?
No, I think she does the layouts for the tampon ads.
Oof, she's gonna have her work cut out for her down there. Lot of competition for that job.
Could be a short stint for her. Better get on that one quick.
Absolutely.
But first we gotta figure out which team she plays for, you know what I'm saying?
I'm picking up what yer laying down, my man.
Five bucks says it cocaine.
Ten bucks on vodka and pills.
[fist bump]
